you justify my reasons to hate (...to hate!)

GUILT - BARDSTOWN UGLY BOX

The idea of a record 'dating' is an interesting one. Like it sounds so particularly like the time it was made, and in that context it's fucking cool but outside of that you can't really listen to it because, you know, it's so 2003 dude.

Refused's shape of punk to come got me with that. I got into the band not very long after that record came out and it seemed like there was nothing else like it. I bought the whole 'this is a whole new stage of hardcore' hype. I got the 'reinventing' thing. Fuck that. I listened to that record a few months ago for the first time in six years or so and yeah, wow...record has not aged well AT ALL.

So what makes records not age well? It's partly the sound being a time-specific thing, like at the time that shit was considered legit, or worth releasing or not embarassing to play in front of yr friends. And it's partly what came after it, influenced by it, that makes it unpalatable. I have a friend who likes Quicksand in theory at least, like can see what they were doing and where they were coming from, but can't listen to them because they're 'proto nu metal'. Slip, well the song dine alone on rage, got me even before I'd heard Tool (who ripped them off a tonne), so, I've never had that problem even though I can totally hear that shit. Therefore, I still blast that record all the time, and when Gorilla Biscuits played here the other weekend I almost (chickened out at the last second) went up to Walter and was like 'dude when I was like, 14, Quicksand fucking CHANGED MY LIFE'.

Anyway, Guilt's bardstown ugly box is probably a record that hasn't aged well. But I fucking love it. Not because I have some kind of teenage attachment to it or anything. I actually only heard this band about a year ago. But with certain bands I often like them as much for where they're going as whether or not they actually get there, so to speak. That's I guess why I dig so much 90's stuff even though I wasn't 'there' for it until like 98, 99. There's a charming amateur quality and a sense of 'here it is, for better or worse, at least it's (sort of) honest' that I feel is lacking a little from hardcore punk today. Sure I'm totally nostalgia-fying that a lot, I know for a fact there were a lot of cynical dicks around back then, just as many as there are now, maybe more. Reading stories about the MTM fests makes me think that nothing ever changes; shit sounds exactly the same as LLDIY or whatever, both the good and bad parts, and the hilarious parts.

Guilt are definitely a case of the journey as much as the destination. This record's from '94 or '95 or something, I forget which. They'd always interested me because I remember them being cited by a few people in zines I read as a huge influence on Shotmaker, who I thought were fucking incredible. Also they were Duncan Barlowe's post-Endpoint band and that guy's always interested me. Barlowe, if you can't place the name, was the guy who famously 'resigned' from hardcore after someone from Ten Yard Fight (or Floorpunch, fuck I always mix the two up) decked him for 'talking shit'. Barlowe had protested that said dude had said 'selling out edge was one step away from taking a dick up the arse' and Duncan was like, hey, that's homophobic bullshit, fuck you.

As much as the 'resignation' was a pointless act I kind of admired the spirit of it. I also liked the way Barlowe and his long term musical compatriot, Rob Pennington, reflected a kind of ambiguity with their music that was really cool. See by the time I was getting into this shit there was a seperate thing going on, what you'd now call the hessians or whatever, all us PC kids, we were retreating to screamo or thrash or wherever the fuck and leaving 'hardcore' to the people who didn't care about the shit we did. Barlowe's bands put records out on Victory and played hardcore shows, all the way up to his last 'hardcore' band, By the Grace of God. They played within that scene and tried to bring those messages into the fold. And yeah it got caught up in the hype and styles of the time, there's lots of hilarious stories about people crying at Endpoint shows and stuff. But listening to that music, made fourteen years ago, I still get that and I fucking admire and love and respect it for all it's worth.

Bardstown Ugly Box sounds nothing like Shotmaker. I can see the influence but still. It's midpaced, chuggy post-hardcore, rock, metal, what the fuck ever. I really wanted to cover omega in Ex Spectator, so I played it to Kirk and Sean and they were like 'dude...this sounds like Grinspoon'. Yeah. Thanks to the stuff that came after it hasn't dated well. But in 1994 tuning down to drop D and playing mid paced shit was pretty next level.

Guilt were that classic case of dude in big hardcore band's next project; what Quicksand was to GB for Walter Schrieffels (sp?) or Embrace was to Minor Threat for Ian Mackaye: time to slow down and get introspective. In some ways, much like those two bands actually, it's really fucking clumsy. But like those two bands I love it because it's a group of people trying to find their way around something new and different, trying to express something else.

The record has one of the worst drum sounds I've ever heard and it has that wonderful early 90s taking itself seriously pretension: check the tracklisting below, and also the record is divided into two parts; 'man against society' and 'man against himself'. It has a fucking doctored photo of a cat in a suit and tie on the CD itself (let me remind you, this came out on Victory). It has ambiguous fugazi-ish artwork. Barlowe's vocals are pretty bad. You can't hear the bass too well and the guitars are, to borrow my friend's phrase, proto nu metal.

But it has some fucking killer moments. Listen to omega and tell me you're not fucking stoked with that chorus. Listen to the quiet breakdown in phi and lose yr shit like I do, and think about how many times those Twelve Hour Turn style chord changes have showed up in the music we listen to since. Cringe at lines like 'and as I watch you sleep, yr beauty kills me'. It's so bad it's good and it's also, at the same time, a legit-ly fucking awesome, rocking mid-paced hardcore or post hardcore or whatever record.

Guilt put out a bunch of shit including a record called further which is fucking KILLER, and I'll get around to upping eventually. The leap they made from this LP to that is unbelievable, the record wouldn't sound out of place today. But I figure it's good to start here.

Both are still in print from Victory so, you know...I don't give a shit about them actually but in principle, if you like this stuff, buy the records to add to yr collection of vinyls.

http://www.mediafire.com/download.php?vzm51ydyumz

Guilt - Bardstown Ugly Box (Victory Records, VR029, 1994 or 5?)

SIDE A, 'man against society'; Gamma / Omega / Chi

SIDE B, 'man against himself'; Xi / Omnicron / Theta / Phi

the dire and ever circling wolves

J-LO BIAFRA

When I left Whitehorse I was determined to do something, anything, in a simillar vein to what we'd been doing up to that point. I left because I was more into the dymanic, loud then quiet then loud, being really creepy kind of schtick that's somewhat evident (particularly on the second song with that tremolo guitar part) on the first recording. They wanted to go in the direction of producing just a more brutal, full on aural assault that Emile described as 'like being kicked in the face' that would eventually lead them to the point they are/were at with their most recent stuff; music that's a lot like watching Corrupted, while being kicked in the face. They're fucking amazing, hopefully they play again sometime next year.

But I'd discovered the world of loop pedals and shit like that during this time, and been inspired by what Grover was doing with his noise effects stuff. At the same time my mind was being completely fucking blown by music Pete had introduced me to when we started Whitehorse (Earth, Boris, particularly 'flood'), and the instrumental stuff that I'd been getting into for the last four years, part of what is now dubiously described as 'post rock' music - Mogwai, Hotel2Tango bands, etc.

So I set out with a couple of loopers and some other effects and attempted to make my own instrumental jams. I played one show under the name 'leisure like work is dead time', stolen at the last minute from the insert of Wolves' 'simulation...' LP, then changed the name to J-Lo Biafra. That shit joke would come back to haunt me. For instance at a show in adelaide I had a 40 something woman dressed up for a gallery opening wanting to talk to me about the implications of the cross-cultural juxtaposition of the name. I just thought it was funny.

Anyway it continued on for four years and would change and develop as my tastes grew. Initially starting out trying to be a cross between a doom band and Silver Mt. Zion's more quiet moments. Then I got pretty heavily into Growing around the same time as I was trying to make my guitar much more processed and not like a guitar. Then came the drum machine and the idea of big epic 'songs', and so on. I did some shitty, recorded to a boombox tapes and gave them away or sold them, and I ended up playing brisbane a couple of times, sydney a couple of times, adelaide, and a bunch of shows friends put on in melbourne, where I'd be like 'hey, if like, you need someone to open...'. It wasn't a big deal, I'd just be out with another band or a friends' band and be like 'hey can I bring my pedals along and play?'.

Biafra was always about the gear too, and the music would change and develop as I bought and sold new guitars and new pedals, tried new tunings and the like. But by the start of this year I was sick of the dumb name, and sick of the music entirely. By now all this sort of stuff had well and truly become considered 'post rock', which was defined as boring, white guy post emo with delay pedals replacing the shit lyrics. I was increasingly aware that I wasn't the only arsehole with a guitar and a looper doing this music, was definitely not the first, and would not be the last. And most people were doing it way better than me.

And I think it was ruined by too much gear. There was always too much going on in the music, then I'd watch people with much simpler setups play really basic sets that just blew what I was doing away. Also I'm not a great improviser or solo musician by any stretch of the imagination. My ideas are hugely unoriginal and I always need someone to help me build them. And I'd never practice and so being 'improvised' never helped. There were some great moments in there but probably only ever played two shows that I thought were worth anything. It got to a point where I was like 'who the fuck am I to inflict this shit on people?'. Why the hell am I playing music I think is terrible to people? Also someone compared it to Explosions in the Sky and I fucking despise that band. Good time to bail.

So, after not having played for ages, Fjorn asked me to play a thing she was organising earlier this year. I made it my 'last show', played really loud, a few people watched and dug it, that's it. I still make music by myself with my pedals and have played a couple of shows under a different name, but I'm pretty embarassed and insecure and don't think it's anything I want to do other than recorded in my bedroom for now. And honestly I just find myself so fucking disgusted with this 'post rock' thing that yeah...I didn't wanna be associated with it anymore.

Last year I'd made a recording with Pete Sheppo onto his computery stuff. Just a couple of hours in a rehearsal room, improv, built off of pre-written ideas, all done in one take. It was originally going to get a tape release but that was on a label that unsuprisingly flaked. Anna Vo asked to do some more mixing and put it out on her label, An Out, which I was kinda stoked about, but then it just got completely bogged down in me never finishing the art, never coming up with anything I liked, etc. In retrospect volunteering to do art for a project you think is unoriginal, when you also think yr art is incredibly unoriginal and boring...not a good idea. She kept ringing me about it, I kept putting it off, she went on tour with Crux and away and stuff. I listened to it again a few months ago and was like 'this shouldn't see the light of day'.

It's...I dunno, there's bits I like and there's bits that I think are terrible. The overly compressed guitar sound for one (my fault, not Pete's). The complete lack of originality for another. Most of me is thinking I should take the same attitude I did with the 'band' itself; if I didn't think it was good enough for other people to hear it, then, you know, don't put it out where other people can hear it. I should also bear that in mind with my current thing I do, Sleeping Weather, but yeah...there's a fuck of a lot of fun to be had in making that kind of noise I guess, no matter how insecure I am about it. Ego and self-indulgence win out from time to time.

So here it is, the recording I did with Pete in '07. Four songs, no names or anything like that, no mixing at all, just the signal straight from the mics to his computer. For anyone that ever came and watched, and a couple of my friends were always really enthusiastic about it, yeah...here it is if you want a copy. Thanks.

http://www.mediafire.com/download.php?jwuyhzhxtzf